good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
