Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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