I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
