don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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