ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
