Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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