am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
