somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
