Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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