My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize