She announced her abortion via fbk
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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