Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
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