No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You pole danced in your parka.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
