There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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