But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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