i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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