Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
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