I hate all girls vehemently.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize