uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Randomize
