it hurts more in the daytime
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
