Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
