Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
