absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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