Your favorite bartender is back from prision
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
