I think I just saw someone hide a body.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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