dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize