one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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