just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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