I wanna passion pit in your ass
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
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