Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
