She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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