Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
