So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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