Me too!
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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