Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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