Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize