I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
