is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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