Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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