you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
