:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
smell my finger.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
