For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
