doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
