And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
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