I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
