Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Randomize
