# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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