Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
