He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
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