Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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