is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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