So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I wish you could order shots online.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize
